What Is Real?

I’m blessed with one of those active-type minds that can spin a lot of options and stories all at once.  Can see twelve sides of the same coin.  And the default settings, for whatever nature nurture reason, are still pretty geared toward risk minimization, protection, and threat assessment.  Meaning that when in doubt my brain goes fear, unless and until I do a manual override.

Fear mode has helped me avoid real dangers, and it continues to. BUT it also has the capacity to keeps me away from real opportunities for joy, peace, and connection with others. That’s why I work my manual override muscle through meditation and other habits that give me more choices about how to live.

So. Today, knowing all that about how I am and how I want to be, I get to practice slowing down when I’m agitated — like pretty much stopping — taking a few deep breaths, wiggling my toes, checking in and saying — what’s real?  Not what do I fear but what’s really going on and what are the real consequences of this or that action?  

What are the real consequences of just giving my kid a few more hugs, or taking an extra nap, not responding to that post I find so appalling, telling my husband his quinoa is tasty and not too spicy at all? Taking some space for myself, little moments throughout the day?

What if everything, including myself and my own decisions about how to live during this time were just fine or - more radical still - didn’t have much consequence at all — in the grand scheme of things.

Clean dishes, dirty dishes, online school, social distance school, cat, dog, long hair, grey hair, bathrobe, leggings, art class, steam, pancakes, tofu scramble, PayPal, Venmo, pounds on, pounds off, whatever.

Usually there’s way more time and space than I think there is when and if I slow down and think it through. Remember that I’m good enough the way I’m built and feeling okay is my right.  And then I get to focus on what really matters to me, under all the cloud cover and potentially dire consequences my unchecked brain generates.  And I go for that stuff first. The stuff that matters, the stuff that’s real. I’m gonna keep going.

www.livingeveryminuteofit.com

www.combatcovidstress.com