Farewell Shelley

An extended member of my family died of cancer after more than a year of successfully fighting it off.  Shelley was my sister Rosie’s mother-in-law, my nephews’ grammy, and someone I would have chosen as a friend even if she hadn’t been family. 

Shelley was one of those people who brought joy to everyone she talked to, a truly warm, kind, quick with a genuine smile or an easy compliment kind of person.  

Being loving and enthusiastic and generous seemed to come naturally to her.  It didn’t look like she had to work at it at all, that’s just how she was.  Even recently when she had her own health issues to face her priority was making sure her family had everything it needed.

I remember hearing about Shelley the first time my sister, as the newish girlfriend of Shelly’s son, met her.  

Rosie said, “Oh my gd, his mom is sooo nice.  She is like, really sweet and really nice.”

“That’s awesome,” I said, typically suspicious, protective of my baby sister.  “Of course, what’s she gonna do? Be mean to you right away? She’s no dope, she knows you might be the mother of her future grandkids.”

“Hee hee hee. Well, I don’t know it really seemed genuine.”

“Ok, great,” I said.

And so it was great.  I watched my sister enjoy the love and support Shelly gave her and her family, her other son and their family.  When we met from time to time over the years it was always as if no time had passed, as if I was someone who mattered to her, specifically.  I hear that she made so many people feel that way — that they had a special place in her heart just for them.  

What an amazing talent, a talent for loving people in the most genuine way, consistently, unwaveringly, day after day, year after year, through everyone’s ups and downs including her own. 

That is a life well-lived to me, the kind of life I want to live, full of love and family, and bringing joy to others.  Shelly, thank you for all your love and kindness, to me, my family, and the world.  You are an inspiration that will stay with me and I’m so grateful to have had you in my life. I’m gonna keep going.

Please make donations in Shelley’s honor here:

https://fundraise.cancerresearch.org/fundraiser/2744313