Coming Home
The woo woos I know sometimes use the term “home” to mean not one’s actual physical residence but a kind of mental centeredness, a state of being in touch with a larger reality or our bigger selves, our more loving, stronger selves. Like, the home that’s inside ourselves regardless of externals.
At least, that’s how I understand it. They say things like, “We are all just walking each other home.”
And, when someone is acting bananas or socially inappropriate or just miserable, “I hope he finds his way home.”
A baseball friend of mine said he thinks of it like home base — where you wind up to be safe, and also where you start from to take action and have fun. Play Ball! Play, not work, not struggle.
When I’m constellating my inner 14-year-old rebel I hear stuff like that and I think, “Barf City, or “Give me a break.”
But sometimes, more of the time lately, I’m thinking about what it means to be home both literally and metaphorically, the within myself woo woo kinda home, where I’m calm and yet ready for anything.
Like, who is this person I am today and what does she need? What is her actual capacity for this, that, and the other thing where life feels breezy, easy, natural?
I know I’ve felt that way before, and actually today, right this second, right now, I’m feeling that way again. Smiley. Happy.
Even though and despite this, that, and the other thing.
I think it has a lot to do with breakfast, which I just ate. It also has a lot to do with a deeper level of honesty and self-acceptance.
What is true? What is my truth? What do I know about the care and maintenance of me that is working and not working? Am I willing to make the changes in my mind and my actions to live my life, my big life, as me, rather than as an idea of what my big life could or should be? A joyous, exciting, bold and true expression of who I am and what I’m about here, now?
For me, it’s a big YES! And I don’t have to be comfortable all the time. I have a proven track record of experiencing some very uncomfortable stuff and surviving, getting stronger, getting through it, and coming home. I know my way home. I know what works for me to get there when I’m lost. I didn’t always, and I still sometimes forget, but today, I’m there, and I’m grateful. I’m gonna keep going.
www.livingeveryminuteofit.com
